C&C Red Alert: Sniping Vodka
by Nigel Yearning
Summary: A sniper has a lone conscript within his sights, but his real target is what the conscript is drinking.
1. Chapter 1

_**Disclaimer: I do not own any Command & Conquer characters**_

_**Claimer: The idea you're about to read is mine**_

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An Allied Sniper was deep within Soviet Territory, he was instructed to cause as much chaos within any Soviet bases. In truth he could do whatever he wants to the enemy, no one knows who thought of the idea but it's arguably an 'official' mission.

The sniper was in Russia somewhere near Moscow, he was searching for a Soviet Military installation housing Red Soldiers. "There's got to be one somewhere." thought the sniper as he hikes along through a forest.

It was in the dead of winter, good thing the sniper was dressed fairly warmly. He was wearing a black winter coat, black pants, hiking boots, brown gloves, and a brown ushanka. Not much of a description of a sniper, thank god he isn't wearing the Allied Logo because that will get him killed. Everyone knows that a sniper can't kill if he or she is dead, the words of Natasha Volkova.

He was hiking for 3 days and so far, didn't shoot anything, the sniper was about to turn back home until something caught his eye in the sky: a Kirov Airship. "This zeppelin seems to be heading for a Soviet base," thought the sniper, "I wonder where it leads."

The sniper follows the Kirov at a distance, although it is slow those bombs will kill him instantly if he gets under it. The low hum of the propellers fills the sniper's ears, the zeppelin was close to the ground. Just 15 stories in the air, why is it flying so close to Earth is a mystery.

"Normally Kirov Airships fly up high in the sky when on bombing runs, but near the ground means it's doing a routine patrol." said the sniper, "Snipers on the Kirov will gun me down if they see me, I must follow the Kirov in a distance if I to reduce my chances of being caught."

Slowly following the heavy bomber, the sniper just stay at his current walking pace. Although he has to speed up from time to time, he has no trouble keeping up with the bomber. As he follows the bomber, the sniper dodges trees since he is in a forest. Those trees will help give him cover by the way, there's snipers on that Kirov you know.

After an hour the sniper followed the Kirov to a Soviet base, just what he's looking for. "Thank you Kirov." said the sniper. The sniper managed to find a hill overlooking the entire base, he took up shelter on the best spot he can find and settles in.

"What a view up here," commented the sniper as he looks down at the base. "I should come to Russia more often."

The Sniper got out his 50 caliber Barret Sniper Rifle, he load the rifle and cock it. With the safety still on, he aims it down on the base and uses the scope to see whats going on down there.

The base seems pretty normal, groups of conscripts were talking to each other awhile others were walking or training. It was very interesting when he spots a soldier walking into a portable toilet to take a dump, he notices another conscript sneaking behind the toilet. He rams into the back of the toilet tipping it over, the poor soldier in the toilet is trapped and covered in crap.

Groups of conscripts who witness this were laughing hard, the toilet appear to be shaking. Appears that the soldier inside is trying to get out, two of his comrades helped him out and sets the toilet upright.

The soldier came out, every inch of him is covered with sewage. This made his buddies laugh even harder, the soldier appears to be yelling at them. "Some comrades." he joked.

He looked around the base for a little bit to see what else is there, and what to kill. He looked at the walls to the compound and spots a lone conscript, out of side of the others. The conscript appears to be drunk and was lighting a cigarette, the sniper notices the conscript was talking to himself so he decides to pull out his sound amplifier to eavesdrop on the Red Soldier.

The Sniper aims the sound amplifier at him and puts on headphones, he begins to listen in on what the conscript was saying. "If I rule this country, I'll might sure there's vodka factory near Kremlin." said the conscript and takes a puff of smoke, "And I'll launch nuke at Statue of Liberty, HA HA HA HA HA!!!"

"What are you talking about?" said the sniper to himself.

The conscript reached into his backpack and pulled out a vodka bottle, "To cheers to Mother Russia, again." he said and chugs on the vodka. The sniper had a thought, he turns the safety off of his rifle and puts a silencer on it. "This is going to be good." he thought as he takes aim at the conscripts vodka bottle.

The conscript drank half of the vodka, before he was able to finish the other half, the sniper fires a 'silent' round right into the bottle. The vodka bottle shatter and the bullet went right through the wall behind the conscript, the conscript appeared he didn't noticed until he realize he's sucking on air instead of alcohol.

"What the?" he said. He finally noticed that his vodka bottle is broken, the sniper noticed the priceless look on the conscript's face and smiled. The conscript got to his knees and yelled out in agony, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!"

"Is is better than Comedy Central." chuckled the sniper as the conscript began acting like a baby. He was rolling around in the ground crying, "And that was my last vodka bottle!" he sobbed.

The sniper was laughing at this, he stopped laughing when he noticed 2 other conscripts noticed his victim whimpering on the ground. "Better get out of here." said the sniper, he picked up his things and got out of there.

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**My first Command & Conquer story, please review and tell me what you think.**


	2. Chapter 2

_**Disclaimer: I do not own any Command & Conquer characters**_

_**Claimer: The idea you're about to read is mine**_

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**_

Just hours after he left the base, the Allied Sniper continues to walk aimlessly in a single direction. The thought of the Conscript and The Red Army chasing him stuck to his mind, the sun is just about to set and the Sniper haven't found shelter yet.

Making his way through the dense forest of Russia, the sniper is getting bored. He stopped walking and sat down on a rock, and began to eat the last of his bread. "I wish I would play with the Conscripts' minds again," he thought as he took a bite of bread, "I wonder what High Command will say about this."

He finished off the rest of his bread and started a small campfire, after concealing the light and smoke of the fire he settled in and roast some Cockroaches he found nearby. Briefly gazing at the sky, he got out a notebook and began to write in it.

_Log 78 _

_February 23, 2010_

_It hasn't been what I expect a few hours ago, I played with a conscript's mind and I still can't believe how immature he is. Where's the discipline within these soldiers? They drink awhile on duty and they played pranks on each other, on the way over here I saw one conscript digging to the trash of someone's home. _

_Maybe I could use this to my advantage but where I' am going to demoralize them in a single night? _

He stopped writing and began to think, he'll probably get promoted by crushing the Red Army's spirit but how? He then smelled a odor which is somehow familiar, "What is that?" he asked himself. He got to his feet and put out the fire, acting quickly he ran towards the source of the smell dodging trees and logs along the way.

He made his way to a clearing when he saw a ridicules sight, a large brewery: A Vodka Brewery. He saw Conscripts driving the trucks going in and out of the complex, probably they're delivering vodka to the Soviet base and to Moscow. The sniper knew he struck gold, a potential promotion.

Sneaking down to the complex, he broke into the brewery via open window. The smell of grain fills the air as he makes his way to the fermentation room, the sniper saw row after rower of brewing chambers.

"Excellent," thought the sniper as he pulls out C4 from his backpack, He stuck the C4 under the largest brewing pot he could find and hightails it out of the brewery through the same window he came in.

Retreating back into the woods, he set off the C4 by remote control. The brewery exploded in a ball of fire, conscripts nearby were too horrified to watch as the vodka brewery burned to the ground. My god, their crying like little 4 year olds. They're probably new recruits, or their F up.

"Wow, that was really fast." thought the sniper as he watch the building burn, "I wonder what this leaves me?"

Right after he said that, a bullet ripped through his head killing him before he hit the ground. He collapsed onto the earth and bleeds out. 2 miles away in the patch of woods on the other side of the facility, a young male with brown hair, green eyes, and wearing green cameo equipped with a Barret Sniper Rifle with the barrel depositing smoke into the air.

"John Dimitri Reznov, you did it again." said the freelancer as he got to his feet, "It's very foolish for a nation to send out a sniper alone in enemy territory, serves him right for wasting good vodka."

Dimitri walked away into the night heading for Moscow to finish off his vacation, with an interesting story to tell to friends and family back at New York.

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**Well since there were so many views to this story and it's beginning to being favorited to by viewers, I decided to add another chapter. Why did I have my OC John Reznov to kill the sniper at the end is because I do not want fans to bug me on making more chapters for this story, I'll probably describe why John is near Moscow in an unrelated story so don't ask me about that. Please review and tell me what you think.**


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